Why Is It Showing Me This? Recommendations

1. What your child learns and why

Your child learns that a feed of clips is arranged by a program that guesses what they will like from what they did before. Every “like” makes it narrower. In our game they see this with their own eyes and discover two things: they can choose something different on purpose, and only they decide when to stop. The aim is a sense of control, not fear: the feed is not an enemy but a helper that guesses.

2. Three questions for dinner

• “Did you notice today that your feed shows you the same sort of thing? What did you like?”
• “If you could tell the feed one thing that is different from usual, what would it be?”
• “How do you know it's time to stop?” (No explanations — just listen.)

3. 10 minutes together without a screen — “The Recommender”

1. Draw 18 slips with 6 topics, 3 each. One of you is the recommender, the other is the child. The recommender puts out 4 different slips.
2. The child points at one. The recommender puts out 4 new ones, at least 3 from the same topic. Three rounds, then “show me something new” with three new topics.
3. Swap roles. Ask: “When was it handy and when did it stop you seeing something else?”

4. What success looks like

• The child says in their own words that the feed guesses from what they did.
• They can name at least one way to make it more varied.

5. Common difficulties

• Says “the feed knows me” → “It guesses from what you did. It does not know how you feel.”
• Does not want to stop → no blame; agree together when the end is, e.g. “two more clips and done”.

Say: “You steer the feed, it does not steer you.” Do not punish or threaten; talk about control, not bans.

6. Safety

Everything in the lesson is a simulation: no real platform, account or data. If the app your child uses has a setting for fewer personalised recommendations or a “not interested” option, look at it together. In the EU the very largest platforms must offer a version not arranged by your profile (Digital Services Act, art. 38). If something frightens your child — they should tell an adult they trust.

7. Where to go next

Next lesson: coming soon. Previous: DB-II-01 (coming soon); if needed see DB-IB-06 “How AI ‘Guesses’”.

You don't need to know the answer. Say: “Let's find out together.”